User Profile

I'm semi-recent to playing publicly, but have been dabbling within the Scene (online and via one on one things with others) for some time now.

I am learning still (show me someone who is not), and figuring out what applies to me, what resonates, and how to apply it in the best possible way to my own life and play.

I am veeeery physically sensitive, and so, am not one for heavy play. But then, a light scene (for me) *can* be pretty intense, so I think I am getting out of it precisely what others might with more heavy play.

I have found that bits of myself are not satisfied outside of the Scene (and trust me... I've tried to smosh myself into the traditional world, and just keep coming up empty handed), so being here seems to be a nexus for me. It ties together many threads that have been hanging loose for a long time. I am married to a "fire top", but am too physically sensitive to do a fire scene myself and am more into the power exchange and mental aspects of a D/s relationship, which he in turn has no interest in. So, in essence, the mate and I are not compatible in the D/s world. We are poly, however, and have worked out our dynamic fairly well.

Amongst all of the loose ends is a spiritual connection. "Power exchange", to me, is more than offering will to another. That has been one of the most interesting discoveries for me since my beginnings in kink.

I consider myself an "Alpha Submissive". This does NOT mean I need to be your "Number One". It means that I am a *very* capable person in my own right, am not a shrinking violet by any means, and am aggressive in most ways. It means I am fiery, passionate, opinionated, stubborn, and direct. It means I speak my strongly held opinions as my "facts" ("my" being the operative word there). It means I will passionately debate anything that I feel strongly about, point out what I see to be the flaws in others arguments, and do not see the need to "validate" everyone else's side of the argument (though I'd die for your right to hold your own opinion, even if it does not match my own). It also means that nor do I need *others* validation of my *own* POV in order to feel good about myself. All of which adds up to my being a lot to handle for anyone who would want to partner with, or Top/Dom/Master me. The upside is, I can be asked to do just about anything, and will find a way to make that happen (whatever it may be). But, let me be clear here... "submissive" in my case does not equate to "timid" or "demure". This pet is still wild, and will never be fully domesticated. Respect me, and you needn't worry. Do not, and I will snatch the leash from your hand and beat you with it (metaphorically speaking). Go ask "Roy" what happens when you fail to respect the tiger. What does this mean? *No* non-negotiated scenes, *do not* cross my stated boundaries, and absorb, accept and understand the information regarding who and what I am that is posted here. If you can't handle a person such as described herein? Why contact me? If you can, and you respect those things, then this pet will move mountains in your honor and purr contentedly and adoringly from your feet for you.

The ideal Top/Dom/Master for me is someone who has ***control of himself first***... for, if you cannot control yourself and your own life, how can you hope to control another, most especially someone who is capable and strong in her own right? I seek a level of trust that is easily broken by unkind words and anger. If you are one who seeks the humiliation of your sub, dominance through fear, who cannot take direct communication and opinionated people, or are just prone to sarcasm, biting commentary, ridicule or ad hominem attacks, then we really are not compatible (see above about respecting the tiger).

If you're a major "Fire breathing dragon of a conservative", are from the south and/or speak that beyond subtle version of English wherein you can insult someone so that they will not realize it for another hour, if you beat around the bush with "polite" (obtuse) verbiage instead of just coming out and saying what it is you want to say respectfully, if you take offense to direct, but respectful communication yourself, and feel uncomfortable when someone deals with you head on, if you do not like it when someone questions you, or quotes your own words to make a point, then let's just get this out of the way right now. We are not likely to get along. I am a Northern girl, born and bred, and appreciate (and provide) honesty. One need not be impenetrable in ones message in order to be diplomatic. In other words, I do not want to have to read around the edges to get your meaning, and will not offer diluted or attenuated commentary myself either.

It is also a MUST that you be ***poly yourself*** AND, if partnered to anyone else, *they* are poly as well. I am not interested in seeing any man who has a "reluctant significant other", and I am not interested in the *least* in "helping" you to convince your mate that poly "is an adventure, not a threat". What I can offer is a secondary role in my own poly dynamic, but I can offer a primary one in the D/s world. I neither want nor need multiple Doms.

And lastly, throughout my worlds, the one universal constant is music. I am a semi-pro musician, and my music is the ultimate expression of who I am. Any man who sings and/or plays an instrument has instant points with me. ;-)

I look forward to still more discoveries, and to forge new bonds.